A Few Days in Guilin

Last weekend, I traveled to Guilin 桂林, located in southern China, to witness firsthand some of the most beautiful scenery China has to offer and for some much needed R&R. It was as gorgeous as everyone says, but it was also incredibly hot. It reminded me a lot of a Minnesotan summer, that is, hot, muggy, sweaty, with tons of mosquitoes (This did not make me homesick, by the way). Luckily for us, it was overcast the first few days we were there, which tempered the steaming weather and only really heated up on the last day. Here's a link to the large amount of pictures I took there. For those of you short on time, I'll skim over the highlights.

People from Guilin (and southern China in general) eat all sorts of crazy things: snakes, lizards, monkeys, etc. Fortunately, we avoided eating all of those things, but we did catch sight of rats being barbecued for human consumption.

Here's a close up: (Not for the faint of heart)

In addition to that tasty morsel, I was able (finally) to capture photographic evidence of some of the most ridiculous customs of this crazy country. (Being a tourist is the perfect cover for taking pictures of strangers without asking their permission)

1.
Baby bums. These are those crotchless pants I was talking about earlier. Yes, it's ridiculously cute and yes, I will miss it dearly.

2.Babies/kids urinating wherever it's convenient, particularly true for young boys. This little guy was peeing into a puddle on this rock, his mother looking on proudly.

3.The ever-present man belly. It's totally acceptable for men, in hot weather, to pull up their shirt and show off their bulging gut. You can see this kind of thing all over the streets (accompanied by rolled up pant legs if it's really hot). And usually, as you can tell from the picture above, the results are not pleasant.

T Minus 5 weeks

It's hard to believe I have only about a month left in China (my official departure date is July 21). Indeed, the other Whitties will all be leaving shortly and by this Wednesday I'll be done with my duties as outlined in my contract. After that, I have nothing left to do but relax. That is, visit all the places I still haven't seen in Xi'an, buy lots of souvenirs for people and try to fit everything I've acquired over the past year into two suitcases. In celebration of my approaching departure

Things I Am Looking Forward To/What I Absolutely Will Not Miss About China

1. I am looking forward to some decent Western food, namely Mexican food, all dairy products and beer that isn't Tsingtao. / I will not miss the sorry attempts at Western cuisine. I have eaten too much tasteless pasta and and too many "salads" covered in "sweet mayonaise." In addition, the view of dairy products here is a little different than our tastes i.e. milk that is indistinguishable from yogurt and chocolate cheese. The approach to alcohol is equally confusing (I have been offered iced red wine on a number of occasions. And don't even get me started on baijiu.)
2. I am really looking forward to some decent coffee. / This gets its own category outside of 'Western food' because I really, really miss good coffee.
   
3. I am looking forward to bathrooms that provide toilet paper, soap and paper towels. (Amazing, I know.) / I will not miss the lackadaisical approach the bathroom cleanliness, where restrooms smell like waste treatment centers and no one washes their hands. Also, I could really go without babies pooping in the middle of the street or in the middle of a department store (really). Most of all, I will not be sad to say goodbye to squat toilets.
4. I am looking forward to being like everyone else. / I will not miss being stared at everywhere I go just because I'm a foreigner or the people who think it's cool to shout 'HELLO' when I walk by.
   
5. I am looking forward to communicating successfully with others and being where things make sense, at least most of the time. / I will not miss not understanding what is going on 98% of the time. Also, I will most certainly not miss the Chinese approach to scheduling (that is, as last minute as possible) or Chinese bureaucracy, where it's just a waste of time to ask 'why?' (no matter how nonsensical things seem) because no one really knows.
   
6. I am looking forward to seeing all my friends and family that I've been missing for the past year. / On the other hand, I will definitely miss my students and all the friends that I've made here and who have made life a little easier in this strange land.
   

Yeah, I know...

"As we all know, the 29th Olympic Games will be held in Beijing..."

If I have to hear this one more time, I'm going to throw up.